Grief is in the undertones

 Grief is in the undertones 

As we move from day to day

In the words that we don’t have to say 

That new text thread 

Without her name 

Grief is in the little things 

Reminding you 

what’s missing 

Bad news

We knew

it would be bad news 

but it still hurts

to hear the truth

Some days are better

And most days are worse

and in the end it’s all borrowed time 

And time we can’t get back 

Is it harder this way?

To say goodbye slowly 

To lose hope in little moments 

to wait for bad news 

💫

 

If I’m reborn as a star

I hope you are shining 

next to me 

Wherever you are,

in this, 

or any lifetime

know that I love you

and I will love you

with a love that keeps expanding 

like the universe 

float

 My arms ache 

from holding you.

My heart aches 

from holding you. 

This love is heavy, 

but it makes me float 

battle

I don’t know when

I’ve ever fought this hard 

I would face dragons and 

walk through fire, 

to feed you the food that comes from my bones 

-when breastfeeding is a battle 

The days before birth

 Stuck between frames

Between planes 

Between panes 

Of glass 

I am in the skipped beat 

The tripped feet 

The moment I cannot 

Move forward or pull back 

(Being here is stretching me)

But suddenly 

Time will snatch me forward 

I will tumble through the doorway

with a roar 

And for the first time 

I will see your face 

Charlotte Street

Stone and ivy

Deep green in magnolia leaves 

I’m walking down Charlotte street 

Wrought iron

Lace against brick

Under the shade of the oak trees

Whose roots lift the sidewalk 

Without a second glance 

The birds gather

At the blown glass feeders

The seeds scatter 

Charlotte: you’re a beauty 

You know how to move me 

The summer sweat 

The breeze that soothes me 

Yellow doors 

And wrap around porches 

Steeped in the shade 

The murmur of voices 

Giving me iced tea, 

Slow down feelings 

My mind drifts 

Muggy morning dreams of you

Charlotte you’re a beauty 

through and through